“The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.” – Benjamin Disraeli
Picture this: You’re deep in the dark wilderness, surrounded by trees with no clear path out. As you stand there, unsure how to navigate your way through, two seasoned explorers appear from the bushes. The first (your ‘Mentor’) hands you a compass and a clearly marked map. The second (your ‘Coach’) hands you a torch and a machete. Thanks to the guiding hand of your Mentor and the empowering support of your Coach, you can now clear your way through the undergrowth… and perhaps even discover a new path along the way.
Coaching and mentoring are often confused as being interchangeable, but there are clear differences between the two. Individually, they’re incredibly powerful disciplines that can help get you to where you want to go… but together? They’re a powerhouse combination that can take your growth and development to a place you never even imagined possible.
Let’s take a look at the main differences between a Coach and a Mentor, why they’re the ultimate support crew for any leader, and how you can find the right ones for your needs.
The Catalyst v The Wise Sage
A Coach is an external professional who guides their Client’s development, helping them maximise their potential. It’s a strategic and structured collaboration, with the Coach trained to challenge and inspire their Client to motivate themselves to reach their goals and discover their capabilities. They’re a catalyst for embedding change, insight, self-awareness and growth. It’s about the helping the Client clarify and decide the action they want to take, and the steps required to get there.
A mentor relationship involves an experienced professional sharing their wisdom and knowledge with someone less experienced, to help them develop and grow (and can also work in reverse!). The mentor’s insights and advice provide helpful direction, guidance and support throughout a person’s career (and often beyond).
Igniting v Nurturing
A Coach ignites potential. With a focused and highly accountable approach, a Coach enables their Client to maximise their performance, harness their energy and achieve specific intentions. They motivate, they push boundaries, they ask lots of (sometimes uncomfortable) questions that inspire their Client to reach new heights or levels of awareness about what’s holding them back.
A mentor plays more of a nurturing role, offering guidance and support. They provide valuable insights and personal experience, acting as a role model, fostering a sense of care and confidence. They can be a steady presence throughout the Mentee’s journey or tap in and out as agreed.
Partnership v Bond
The Coaching relationship is typically a formal, paid partnership centred around achieving defined objectives aligned with their Client’s aspirations. It’s a shared focus and a collaborative partnership, with the Coach encouraging their Client to explore possibilities, generate ideas and develop strategies to help them achieve their life and career intentions. When I’m coaching I don’t put boundaries on what topics are on and off the table, and I treat all conversations holistically.
The mentor relationship is typically unpaid, often informal and characterised by a continuing bond. Mentors take a personal interest in their Mentees’ growth, becoming a confidant and guide for their career or other specific ambitions.
Timeliness v Timelessness
Coaching is generally time-bound and specific. The work is intensely focused on achieving certain results within a defined timeframe, with the Coach providing guidance and feedback to address immediate challenges and opportunities. The goal of coaching, for me, is actually to become redundant – I’m giving people the skills and tools to coach themselves in the future, so that I’m not needed on an ongoing basis!
A mentor relationship often doesn’t have a clear endpoint (unless agreed prior), with the Mentor often providing guidance and support at various stages of their Mentee’s career. Sometimes, it’s a long-term relationship that crosses over into friendship.
Major Benefits: Coach v Mentor
I’ve engaged with Mentors in the past for a variety of reasons. When I was setting up a business, when I went through my career transition and when there were specific skills I wanted to learn to compliment my work (like neurodiversity and emotional intelligence). I also read avidly and have specific thought-leaders I follow (as well as a huge collection of their books!), old managers I worked with that I know I can call and ask for specific advice or counsel, or insight into a company or brand. Mentorship has been instrumental to my success and ongoing growth and development.
A Mentor provides…
- Personal Insights: Mentors offer valuable insights and wisdom that help the Mentee make informed decisions, gain new perspectives and avoid common pitfalls.
- Support and Guidance: Mentors act as a guiding light, offering emotional support, a sympathetic ear, encouragement and reassurance, helping Mentees navigate their journey with confidence.
- Networking and Career Advancement: Mentors can introduce Mentees to their network, opening doors to new collaborations and other mentorship opportunities, accelerating their career development and growth.
I’ve also used coaching for my own growth throughout my career. I’ve worked with one Coach for over 10 years for personal coaching, and along the way engaged different Coaches for specific reasons including supervision, skills like leadership and innovation thinking. I’ve also collaborated with various other Coaches on projects with clients and within coaching communities.
A Coach provides…
- Maximum Performance: Coaches help their Client’s self-reflect to identify their strengths, challenges and resources. Coaches don’t tell or guide from experience, they create the space (or the ideal environment) for Clients to explore, experiment and see what tactics and tools enable their expansion.
- Sustained Growth: Research has found that when it comes to driving long-term behaviour change and learning, you can’t beat coaching. That’s because a Coach helps their Client form helpful habits (and quit unhelpful ones) and inspires action that drives better outcomes for the Client.
- Goal Achievement and Accountability: Coaches take a strategic approach to empowering their Clients – they encourage them to align their life with their values, take well-considered risks, embrace opportunities for growth and stay accountable for their intentions (even if the goals change in the process). Research consistently shows that coaching is a powerful instrument for positive change and personal development.
So… Mentor or Coach?
Remember those seasoned explorers that helped you out, back in the deep dark wilderness? There’s no doubt that the guidance provided by your Mentor set you in the right direction. But it was the tools provided by your Coach that empowered you to make it happen. One isn’t necessarily better than the other, and both would have helped you reach your goal – but the impact is so much greater when their forces are combined.
You won’t be surprised to hear that the magic doesn’t just happen in the wilderness either. Harvard Business Review research found that successful business leaders make heavy use of both coaching and mentoring as part of their professional development.
* Fun fact – a study conducted by the Association for Talent Development found that just by being accountable to someone (i.e. a Mentor or Coach), you’re 65% more likely to achieve your goal, while that rockets to 95% when you make specific appointments to talk through your progress!
Tips for Finding the Right Mentor or Coach
Finding the right Mentor or Coach is critical to the success of the whole process. Thankfully, unlike with family, you get to choose who you want in your corner! Here are some considerations to help you make the right choice:
- Know what you need: Decide whether you need a Mentor or a Coach. Start by understanding your requirements – do you need someone with industry-specific knowledge? Leadership skills? Personal development expertise? Also consider your budget, remembering that coaching is a paid partnership.
- Define your objectives: Clearly outline your intention. What are you hoping to learn? What are your challenges and concerns? What are your goals? Be clear on what you want to get out of it, and communicate clearly to the person who is coaching or mentoring.
- Advice comes in many forms: Seek out books, conferences, free resources and masterclasses for inspiration – there are so many generous thought leaders out there, and a lot their information is free.
- Actively network: Ask for recommendations from colleagues and friends and attend industry events, workshops and seminars to connect with people who share your interests.
- Search online: Use online platforms like LinkedIn to identify potential Mentors and Coaches. Your sessions can be run online via digital platforms like Zoom, so don’t limit your search to your local area!
- Reach out: Get in touch with people you would be excited to work with. Coaches will have a process they follow to meet with you and explore working together. If you’re looking to engage a Mentor in a free exchange, be aware they’re giving up their time and energy for you – so when approaching them, be specific on why and how you’d like to engage them. Never send a vague email asking for a coffee and to ‘pick their brain’. You’ll likely get a no.
- Evaluate Compatibility: Consider the communication style, values and approach of potential Mentors or Coaches, and look for compatibility with your own learning preferences. Don’t be afraid to ask plenty of questions!
- Set expectations: Have an honest discussion about your expectations and ensure explicit agreement about points like confidentiality and the session duration (15-30 minutes is a common expectation).
- Look at their track record: Feel free to ask about previous Clients / relationships, successes and achievements, a good Mentor or Coach will be expecting it.
- Be present: Disconnect from everything else while you’re with your Coach or Mentor and be 100% present. And don’t be late. You’ll only get out of it what you’re willing to put into it!
- Be honest and open-minded: Go into the relationship with a growth mindset and embrace challenging questions, constructive feedback and absolute honesty – they’re essential to the process, and all part of maximising your investment!
- Be appreciative: It seems like a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised how many people have taken up over an hour of my time without even saying thank you (in person or a follow up email afterwards). I would also suggest offering some sort of pay-it forward gesture, even sending a follow-up article based on an interest they have, or offering to connect them with someone else.
Whether you’re an emerging leader or a seasoned pro, enlisting the help of a Coach or Mentor is a fantastic way to develop yourself professionally and personally. But the real magic happens when their efforts are combined – because like in our metaphorical wilderness, it’s not just about finding your way through, it’s about having the tools you need to carve out your own path.
If you’re ready to make some real changes in your life, book a discovery call and let’s have a chat about how my one-on-one coaching program can help you improve your mindset, motivation and momentum. Sometimes it just takes a little support to unlock a load of potential!